


Rainbow Skye

by PrehistoricCat



Category: Primeval
Genre: Alternate Canon, Backstory, F/M, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-01-28
Updated: 2012-01-28
Packaged: 2017-10-30 06:19:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,719
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/328711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrehistoricCat/pseuds/PrehistoricCat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A late night conversation between Abby and Cutter reveals a secret from both of their pasts</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

The thin strip of light filtering through the crack under the door told Abby that Cutter was working late yet again. She sighed; this wasn't good. She was worried about him. All this talk about a woman that had never existed was bad enough, and then the awkwardness between him and Stephen – two men who had once been such close friends now at odds with each other since the revelation that Stephen had slept with Helen before she'd disappeared through the anomaly.

She knocked on the door and went straight in, not waiting to be invited. Cutter barely looked up from his paperwork. “Security asked me to check how long you were planning to stay?”

Cutter blinked and looked at his watch. “I hadn't realised it was so late,” he said. “I need to get this finished. Could be some time.” He nodded at the pile of papers on the desk.

“What is it?” Abby picked up a sheet of paper, barely able to read the scrawly handwriting. 

“Young Connor has been doing some … experiments. I'm trying to make sense of his findings.”

“This is Connor's work?” Abby was surprised; she thought Connor was practically welded to his laptop and would do all of his notes on there.

“Oh no, these are my notes. I prefer the old fashioned way.” He smiled. “I leave the technology to Connor. I just focus on the theories.”

“Then at least let me help you.”

“Thank you, but with respect... I'm having trouble deciphering these readings and I have a degree in this stuff!”

Abby blushed. Cutter turned back to his papers and Abby watched. He had dark circles under his eyes from lack of sleep, and she was certain she heard his stomach growl. “When was the last time you ate properly?” 

Cutter's smile faded. “Define properly.”

“I mean, something that you didn't get from the vending machine down the corridor.” Abby knew she was right to be worried about him. What was it with these Science types? Connor was the same; if she didn't practically shove a plate of food at him sometimes, he'd forget to eat. At least, that was the case before Caroline came along. She took Cutter's silence to mean that he couldn't remember and shook her head. “You need to eat a decent meal.”

“You sound like my mother,” Cutter laughed. 

“Then she's a wise woman. Wait there, I'll be back in a minute.” Abby turned on her heels and disappeared, leaving a slightly bemused Cutter at his desk. When she returned a little while later, she had a tray with two steaming mugs of tea and a plate full of sandwiches. “Sorry it's not a proper meal, but best I could do.” She placed it down on front of Cutter and took one of the mugs for herself and picked up a sandwich from the plate.

“You didn't have to do this,” Cutter said.

“I know. But I wanted to. Now, eat!”

Cutter did as he was told and took a large bite from one of the sandwiches. It was good. The diet of crisps and chocolate he'd been living on for the last few days was not ideal; he knew that, but he'd just got himself into some kind of rut. He muttered a 'thank you' and ate as he scrolled through to the next part of Connor's research notes on the computer.

Abby watched him again. He was certainly a bit of a mystery. What was going through his head right now? Why didn't he just take this work home with him where he could relax? Then she realised he probably didn't want to go home and be reminded of just how alone he was. Abby knew that feeling too well; especially recently. 

“You don't have to stay with me, Abby. I promise that once this section has been done, I'll head home.”

“I told you, I want to help. Even if its just filing.” She picked up the pile of paper he'd already worked on and flicked through. “Is there any particular order to all of this?”

“Abby. Go home.”

Abby frowned, then ignored him and continued looking through the papers.

“Abby. What's wrong? Why are you avoiding going home?” Cutter's voice had softened, and Abby felt something turn in her stomach. He had her; he'd seen through her act.

“It's Connor,” she sighed. “Well, Connor and his girlfriend. They've kind of taken over the flat a little.”

“It's your flat right? If they're making you feel uncomfortable in your own home, then perhaps you should say something to Connor?”

“Connor pays rent, and half the bills. It's as much his home as it is mine, and he's entitled to have whoever he likes over.” She sighed again.

“You're jealous!” Cutter smiled.

“Am not!” The twist in her stomach came again, this time with more force. Perhaps Cutter was right; she was jealous of Caroline – though not in the way he thought. Until she came along, things with her and Connor had been good. Abby had always lived alone previously, but having Connor around had been quite nice. He made her laugh, and she'd begun to actually like his company in the evenings. But then Caroline came on the scene and that all changed. If Connor was home, Caroline would be draped over him possessively and glared at Abby if she even glanced at Connor. Caroline had taken her friend, and she missed him.

“Me thinks the lady doth protest too much!”

“It's not like that! I just miss Connor's company that's all.” Cutter was nodding his head with amusement. “And Caroline's a bitch.”

“So you're avoiding going home because you don't like your flat mate's girlfriend, and it just rubs salt in the wounds reminding you that you're single?” Abby pouted. “Come on! It was pretty obvious for a while that you had a wee crush on Stephen, and I'd have laid bets on the two of you getting together in those early days.” Cutter's eyes saddened.

“Hm, well Stephen's recent revelations have put an end to that.”

“Stephen's disappointed all of us in one way or another.” There was an awkward silence, and Abby swallowed nervously. Finally Cutter broke the silence. “I find it hard to believe that a pretty girl like you doesn't have a long queue of men waiting for her. You shouldn't be sitting at work talking to an old man at this time of night, you should be out at some club enjoying yourself.”

“You're not so old, Cutter! You should be out there too! There must be a lovely lady out there waiting for you to find her.”

“Claudia Brown,” Cutter said sadly. “That's why I sit here each night. Going back to my flat reminds me that I'm alone, and that I never told her how I felt.”

“It'll be OK,” Abby whispered, taking his hand and squeezing it. Cutter smiled, squeezed her hand back and released it.

“Sometimes I think life would've been a whole lot easier if I'd stayed on that project in the Galapagos Islands.”

“You worked on the Galapagos?” Abby's eyes widened. “I love that place! We went there was I was ten. It was what got me hooked on reptiles in the first place.”

“That's some place for a ten year old to go to!” Cutter said. “I took a year out from my studies to work there, soaking up Darwin's theories of evolution and finding myself in the process. What were you doing there at such a young age?”

“It was my mum. She went through a bit of a hippy phase at one point; wanted to save the world!” Abby allowed herself a small smile at the thought. “She'd spent some months out there herself when she was 17... she said I was conceived out there.” She felt her cheeks burn red.

“I couldn't think of a more perfect place for a new life to be created, but 17 is very young.”

“That was the whole problem with my childhood,” Abby said. “She got lucky; met a nice guy when she was five months pregnant with me and he looked after her, married her and raised me as his own.”

“Takes a special kind of man to raise another man's child,” Cutter said. “He must have been a great guy.”

“He was, until the drink got the better of him. I was always jealous of the fact he was Jack's real father, but he used to tell me I was more special because he had chosen to be my father. But mum grew up and she wasn't the seventeen year old he'd first met and they drifted apart....” She found herself blinking back tears and she turned away from Cutter, not wanting him to see her cry.

He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “You don't have to say anything else. I read your files.” Abby was grateful for that. She'd never shared any of this before, and it was incredibly painful. Her father had become abusive, and Abby the main focus of his anger. She was hospitalised at the age of 13 after she'd stood between him and Jack and took the full force of his fists that had been aimed at Jack for spilling blackcurrant juice on the dining room carpet. Abby's mother had sent him packing after that, but she fell into a deep depression and couldn't cope with two children. Finally, when Abby was 14 and Jack 9, they were taken into State care.

“Did they ever try to find your real father?” 

“I don't think mum even knew his name. She said he was some kind of conservation worker on the islands and that he was kind to her, looked after her after her friends deserted her. Back in 1985 she was a bit on the strange side... changed her name to 'Rainbow Skye' and dyed her hair bright red.”

Cutter spat out his tea and almost choked.

“I know! Ridiculous name isn't it? She changed it back to Sarah when she met David, thank god!”

Cutter suddenly began gathering up the papers hurriedly and looking at his watch. “We should go home. Security will be waiting to lock up.” He practically shoved her out of the door. Abby was confused, trying to rack her brains for what she'd said that had rattled him. He bid her a hasty goodbye and told her she should lay down a few ground rules with Connor about his girlfriend.

Abby didn't know what to think as she started her car to drive home. If this was what happened when you opened up and confided your past to someone, then it was probably better to keep it to yourself.


	2. Chapter 2

It only took a few minutes to find what he was looking for. The summer of 1985 had been special, and he'd treasured so many things from that time. He'd been stationed out on Culpepper Island to monitor the turtles; a lonely but very necessary task. He'd watched the tour groups come and go and envied them, wishing he could join them and head over to the main island and mingle with other humans. It wasn't quite what the 20 year old student Nick Cutter had imagined when he volunteered to take a year out from his studies. He was the youngest of the Scientists working on the islands, and there were times he longed to be back amongst his peers.

The group of students from Brighton arrived in late July. He didn't think much of them; they were noisy and he got the impression that they were only doing the 'hippy, vegetarian and animal loving' thing because it was trendy. But she had caught his eye the moment he saw her, and she was flirting with him from the start.

Cutter flipped through the pile of battered photographs until he found it. There she was, smiling at the camera. It was like it was only yesterday that this had been taken – was it really 25 years ago? Those eyes were familiar now too; he saw identical eyes staring at him pretty much every day – why hadn't he noticed before?

Rainbow Skye had been a strong-willed young woman and despite her petite stature, she stood out in the crowd. Perhaps his memory of her had faded somewhat, but now that he thought about it, Abby was every inch her daughter; the only difference being Rainbow's rather magnificent mane of pillar box red hair. When Cutter had first seen her, her hair was loose and billowing around her head in the strong breeze. She kept it under control after that, either underneath a scarf or tied back into a pony tail trailing down the length of her back.

The group of students she was travelling with were all on gap years between college and university. . He envied their freedom, wishing he'd had the money to do the same. To his family, it had either been 'go to university or get a job and start paying your way'. Rainbow was the only one amongst them that actually seemed interested in the significance of where they were. She asked the right kind of questions and showed a degree of prior knowledge. The young Nick Cutter had found himself blushing when she spoke to him and he realised that he was falling for her.

Cutter settled himself down on the sofa in his flat and closed his eyes. His mind wandered back to that early August morning when Rainbow had turned up at his accommodation in obvious distress.

“What's wrong?” She was a dreadful sight; her thick black mascara stained her cheeks where she'd obviously been crying, her clothes were creased as if she'd slept in them and her hair seemed both uncombed and unwashed.

“They've gone!” she sobbed.

“Who?”

“The others I was travelling with. We've been arguing for the last couple of days; they wanted to move on and find somewhere with a bit more action, but I wanted to stay here for the month as we'd planned.”

Cutter guided the distraught young woman into his room. He lived, cooked and slept in the same room and had just a small bathroom, so it was a mess, but he didn't care. All that mattered was Rainbow. He rummaged around and found a roll of toilet paper so she could wipe her tears and then sat beside her on the bed. “Did they take your money and your passport? I can call the authorities for you and...”

“No, its fine. They just up and went during the night; the note said they'd managed to get on a flight to Peru. I don't know what to do Nick! I was supposed to be travelling with them for another four months.”

She was shaking, and almost choking on her sobs. Cutter wasn't quite sure what was appropriate since he didn't really know her that well. His gut told him she needed a shoulder to cry on, so he placed his hand on her shoulder and rubbed it sympathetically. Moments later, her head was buried in his chest and she was crying hard, gripping onto him as if her life depended on it. Feeling more than just a little awkward, Cutter stroked her back and ran his fingers through her hair. He had to fight back a strange urge; the sensation of finally touching that beautiful thick hair he'd admired was doing things to him that were definitely inappropriate for this situation.

When her crying finally subsided, he let her use his bathroom to get herself cleaned up whilst he tried to throw together some kind of breakfast and coffee for them both. When she emerged, she looked more like her usual self, save for the redness around her eyes from the crying. 

“It'll be OK,” he said. “Being here on your own isn't so bad, and there's plenty of tour groups coming and going all the time. Maybe another group of travellers will come and you could join them?”

Rainbow shook her head. “No, I don't think I could trust anyone again. I can't afford another flight, so I'm stuck here until mine's due. Then I'll have to try and contact my parents when I'm in Peru and see if they can send me some money to get a flight home. I don't want to do this any more.”

“Well, I'm happy to keep you company for the remaining time you have here.”

“You're so sweet, Nick! Thank you.” Rainbow leaned in and kissed his cheek. That was when it all changed. He stopped fighting his feelings and kissed her back, full on the mouth. She let out a sigh and responded, and before he knew it they were tangled on the bed together, pulling each other's clothes off and having sex. They'd both needed it; Cutter's months of loneliness forgotten the moment they connected.

Rainbow stayed another ten days before her scheduled flight to Peru. They became inseparable in that time; she would sit with him in silence as he did his observations, and then they'd sit together on the beach watching the tide. They made love at any opportunity and Cutter began to think that perhaps he was falling in love. Rainbow had said that he was her first, and that he would always be special to her. When she left, he pressed a piece of paper into her hand with his address on and she promised she'd write to him and let him know she was home safely. 

It was the last he heard of her, until now. Back then, hardly anyone had mobile phones or email addresses, so he was completely reliant on her contacting him. He had thought about trying to find her when he got back to the UK – surely there wouldn't be that many girls from Brighton with bright red hair called Rainbow Skye? But his pride had stopped him. If she wanted to remain in touch, she would have done so. To her, he was obviously just a holiday romance and he began to wonder if he really was her first or whether that was just a line she gave to every man foolish enough to fall for it. He went back home in October, and met Helen in November. If he'd had any idea whatsoever that Rainbow was pregnant, he'd have made more of an effort to find her. How different things would have been if he had.

He stared at the photo again. Abby was certainly her daughter, of that there was no doubt. The question was, did he tell Abby that he was her real father? He'd read Abby's personal file and knew what she'd been through. How would she feel after all this time? Abby had moved on with her life, become a strong, independent woman in her own right. Would knowing her real father now change anything for the better?

Sighing, Cutter slid the photo into the back of his wallet where he intended to keep it well hidden until he'd decided what to do. Perhaps there were some things best left in the past?

-o-

He leaned against the window, staring down into the main hub of the ARC below. Abby and Connor were clearly in the middle of some kind of argument; obviously Abby had taken his advice and told Connor she felt uncomfortable about his girlfriend being around so much. Abby's annoyance was obvious, hand on hip and skirt twitching whilst Connor paced around shaking his head. Cutter felt almost sorry for the young man; he wouldn't like to be on the wrong side of Abby's temper either.

“I wish those two would stop acting like a pair of kids and realise they were in love with each other,” a familiar voice said. It was Jenny Lewis, and she had been standing next to Cutter for some time. 

“If that's what youngsters these days do when they're in love, then I'll take a rain check on it.” Cutter laughed. 

“Any idea what's got them so worked up this time?”

“Connor's got a new girlfriend, and Abby doesn't like her.”

“Ah, she's jealous.”

“That's what I said, but Abby's not having any of it.”

The pair exchanged a look of amusement, and for a moment there was a connection there. Jenny was Claudia Brown, he knew it and yet no-one else would believe him... except perhaps Connor who seemed to have grasped the concept of his theory very well.

“Miss Lewis... you're needed.” Leek poked his head out of Lester's office door, and Jenny gave Cutter a look of apology before she turned on her heels to see what Leek and Lester needed her for.

Cutter turned back to watching Abby. The arguing had stopped for the time being, but she was sat with her back to Connor. That meant that he could see her face and he ached for her. He knew she was all front but he could tell that she was upset by this latest argument. Why didn't she just tell Connor how she really felt about him? He was certain Connor still had feelings for her but his own lack of self worth seemed to hold him back. Not so long ago, Connor had followed her around like a love-sick puppy, but Abby only had eyes for Stephen. Connor convinced himself he was no competition for Stephen and backed off to save his own heart from breaking. 

Perhaps Abby's reluctance to get into a relationship was partly his fault? She'd had a lifetime of being let down by people who were supposed to love her, why would she put herself into that situation again voluntarily? This was something he had to put right. It certainly wouldn't make up for all those years she'd not had a father in her life, but it would go some way to helping especially if she and Connor ended up being the perfect couple. If he couldn't tell her that he was her father, he could at least act like a father. He'd start with Connor; he trusted him and he'd listen.

On the pretence of pulling rank as leader, he decided he'd get Connor into his office to discuss his concerns that the constant arguing with Abby was having a negative effect on the team. As he began to make his way there, preparing his opening speech for Connor, Jenny called after him from Lester's office.

“Cutter, get the team together. We have a missing boy; pulled through a storm drain. Same place as the brief anomaly alert we had earlier, could be a creature attack. Lester wants us to go and take a look.”

The chat with Connor was going to have to wait.


	3. Chapter 3

It was all his fault. Abby was dead because of his stubborness. Cutter sat in his car outside the warehouse where Jenny had suggested looking for the creature... and very likely the bodies of Lucien Hope and Abby.

Events of the last couple of days had spiralled out of control very rapidly and it was only now that he was able to sit back and try to make sense of everything. What had started as a missing person investigation became a search for an underwater anomaly and a seemingly carnivorous creature that was lurking in the depths of the canal. Maybe he'd been distracted by Connor and Abby's arguing and allowed his feelings as a father to cloud his judgement... or maybe he'd just refused to accept that Stephen could be right and he was wrong. Whatever the excuse was made no difference now. Abby had been snatched overboard by the same creature that had taken Lucien, and after hours of searching they had to give up. 

He dialled Connor's number and knew immediately that Connor wouldn't answer. He had to try though. There was still a creature on the loose and it would certainly kill again. He at least owed it to Abby to make sure no-one else died. Somehow he had to convince Connor of that too, even if he was angry with him. The phone was answered but Connor remained silent. It was something he supposed; at least he was listening. He tried to sound calm and in control, apologising for his mistakes and then telling Connor that if he changed his mind, Jenny knew where to find him.

After he'd ended the one-sided conversation, Cutter got out and made his way into the warehouse. It wasn't that far from the canal where Abby had been taken, and if Jenny was right about the flooding, it was very possible that the creature could have ended up being able to go backwards and forwards between the two places. Inside, it was obvious the place hadn't been used in some time. It was a huge, empty space and even the sound of Cutter's breathing seemed to echo. Ground level seemed fine, but below him in the basement he could hear the sound of rushing water. Jenny had been right; the basement was flooded. If he found the creature here, he would have to at least buy her a drink as a thank you for the tip-off. His joy at being right was short-lived though; what else would he find here? 

He paced around, trying to find a way down into the basement. The only way he could find was covered over by a thick grill, and it was stuck fast. 

“Would this help?”

Cutter's heart leapt. Connor had come after all. He appreciated just how difficult it must be for him, and despite the fact he was trying to sound like he was still angry, Cutter knew Connor was grieving for the loss of his friend... and the girl he loved. He hardly dare turn around. He knew if he saw how much Connor's heart was breaking, he would lose it too and someone had to remain calm.

“Yeah, that'll do the trick” Connor handed him a crowbar and stood back. “Thanks for coming.”

“With respect, I'm not doing it for you. It's what she would've wanted. We had an argument. The last things we said to each other were mean and... stupid.”

“She knew how much you cared about her.”

“You think?”

“I know.”

“Yeah.” With a deep breath, Connor finally came over and crouched next to him. Cutter could see the pain in Connor's eyes; a pain he was certain would be mirrored in his own eyes. One day, when the hurting had lessened, maybe he'd be able to tell Connor that Abby was his daughter and they could remember her together. But that was for later. Right now, they both had to pull themselves together and find this creature.

He gave Connor a friendly nudge and asked if he was alright. He knew it was a stupid question, but it made Connor gather his wits again and focus on the immediate task of opening the grill and getting down into the basement.

As they climbed down, Connor's hand held detector sprang into life. The anomaly that the creature had come through had reopened... and it was behind a brick wall. Connor's frustration got the better of him, but Cutter remained calm. “It's just a wall,” he said, smashing into it with the crowbar. It began to crumble fairly easily, and soon enough there was a hole large enough for them to go through. They heard shouting, and the situation suddenly became more urgent; someone was there.

They found Lucien, trapped inside some kind of water tank. As Cutter released him, he said something that elated both Cutter and Connor and raised their hopes. “You've got to help Abby!”

“Abby's still alive?” 

“They took her... down the pipe.” Lucien pointed, and before Cutter could do anything else, Connor was off like a shot, calling Abby's name. He let him go; if there was the slightest chance that Abby was still alive then it should be Connor that found her. He needed to, and maybe she needed him to be the one to find her. Cutter concentrated on Lucien and finding the creature. Whilst the anomaly was still open, they could get the creature to go through. 

“What did it look like?”

The look of terror on Lucien's face said it all. Cutter turned and in front of him was the creature. It was like some kind of giant walrus but far more terrifying. Lucien's anger at being held captive for so long seemed to make him brave, and he picked up a nearby chunk of rock and threw it at the creature, knocking it out. Then suddenly, a second creature shot through an overhead pipe and knocked Cutter backwards into the water tank. 

He'd never felt more terrified in his life and feared this was it for him. He was going to die here. Bracing himself for the inevitable, Cutter squared up and faced the creature full on. He wasn't going without a fight. 

Suddenly, there was a surge and loud gasp for air, and Stephen rose out of the water. Cutter could only assume that he'd found the same route from the canal that the creatures had – thank god he had! Stephen had shot the creature dead within seconds.

“Where's Connor?” Stephen breathed as he pulled himself out of the water.

“He went looking for Abby.”

“Then there could still be more creatures, we have to find them!” Stephen barely paused o shake the water from his body. He ran off in search of Connor and Abby, gun poised ready for action. Cutter was behind him straight away, determined that they would find both of their young team members safe and well. The second room in the basement was empty; no sign of either of them or a creature, but the anomaly glowed and pulsed in the corner.

“They've gone through!” Cutter yelled. Without hesitating, he went towards it.

“Cutter! That anomaly has been unstable for the last few days. It could close any second and trap us.” Stephen grabbed his arm, but Cutter shrugged him off.

“You can stay here if you want, but I'm not giving up on them.” He knew without looking that Stephen was following him as he crossed through to the other side.

The rocky terrain was difficult underfoot, and the air felt humid and heavy. Storm clouds were gathered in the distance and Cutter could see lightning. Given the fact that the creatures they'd encountered were completely unknown to him, he could only deduce that this was the future. Part of him wanted to linger and take it in, but he needed to find Connor and Abby. He heard shouting ahead; Connor's panicked tones and a scream that sounded like Abby.

“Over there!” Cutter said, motioning for Stephen to follow. As they reached the edge of the cliff, Cutter's heart leapt into his mouth. Abby was hanging by one hand with Connor clinging to her desperately trying to pull her back up. He willed Connor to hold tight for just a few more seconds until he and Stephen could reach them and help. If Abby slipped to her death now after everything that had happened... 

“I can't!... I love you!” Connor's declaration echoed around the rocks, and Cutter felt a surge of joy. He knew it! Connor may have got himself a girlfriend, but Abby was the one he really wanted to be with. Now Abby just had to realise that she wanted to be with Connor too, and this might just be the wake up call she needed.

To his horror, he saw Connor begin to lose his grip and Abby was slipping. Something moved him forward and he grabbed Connor's other hand. “Time to go!” he said, and between them, they managed to pull Abby back up and to safety. There was no time for celebration yet though. Stephen threw him a gun and they fired at the approaching creatures. This was how it should be; him and Stephen side by side as a team again, and Abby in Connor's protective embrace; a team of a different kind. 

Creatures dealt with, the four made their way back to the anomaly, exhausted, relieved but elated. The awkwardness between Stephen and Cutter pushed aside, and Connor refusing to let Abby go until they reached the medics waiting for them back at the warehouse.

-o-

Cutter watched as the clean up team went about their business, and Jenny made sure that Lucien was safely on his way to the hospital. Abby had refused to go, she just wanted to go home and get out of her wet clothes. She looked exhausted and Cutter felt an urge to hug her and take care of her, but he had to hold back. It wouldn't be appropriate for him to do that; she didn't know he was her father. If she was going be hugged, it would have to be Connor and based on what he'd just witnessed that was a pretty definite possibility. But then he spotted Connor looking dejected and hanging back. 

“Everything OK, Connor?”

“Mm, yeah.”

“You don't sound so sure. It's been a pretty intense couple of hours. I bet you can't wait to take Abby home and talk.”

“Talk. Not sure I want to.” Connor wrinkled his nose. Cutter was puzzled, what had happened in the last few minutes to change things?

“But she knows exactly how you feel now. Surely that's something to talk about?”

“What's the point? She told Lucien that I'm not her boyfriend, and she said it like she was disgusted that someone would think we were a couple. Not the first time she's done that either.” Connor shook his head and went to look for a towel to dry himself on.

Cutter stared after Connor in disbelief. Was he really giving up on Abby so easily after what had happened today? They'd almost lost her – hell, they'd believed she was dead for a while. Connor had saved her life, and she had brushed him aside as if he was an annoying insect settled on her clothing. Short of locking them in a room alone together until they actually talked to each other about the things that mattered, he didn't know what to do.

All he wanted was for Abby to have some happiness – perhaps it was time for some fatherly advice before she pushed Connor away so far he wouldn't come back.


	4. Chapter 4

Abby was sat on the steps outside the warehouse, a blanket draped around her shoulders and one of her boots in her hand. She was trying to squeeze some of the water out of the canvas and looked pretty miserable. The mascara running down her cheeks reminded him of the day Rainbow had come to see him; it could almost be her were it not for the fact Abby's short cropped white blonde hair set her apart from her mother.

Cutter had thought that telling her who he was would serve no purpose now, but after almost losing her today he'd changed his mind. He had no idea how she'd react; and he wouldn't blame her if she hated him for not being a part of her life when she really needed him. But he could make amends to a certain degree now; she needed a fatherly figure and life was too short to waste it by being alone and bitter.

He took a deep breath, then moved closer. “You look just like your mother sitting there like that.”

Abby looked up, puzzled. “How would you know that?”

“You'd be surprised. OK if I sit with you?” Abby nodded, and shifted over to let Cutter sit next to her. “Culpepper Island, August 1985. I was stationed out there when your mother visited with her friends. When you mentioned her name the other night, I knew who she was straight away.”

“I guess she wasn't someone you'd forget easily!” Abby laughed. Cutter reached into his back pocket and took out his wallet. He pulled out the dog-eared photo and gave it to Abby without a word. She ran her fingers lightly over the face smiling back at her, and bit down on her bottom lip to stop herself crying. “You kept a photo of her all this time? Why?” Abby whispered. 

“She was a special woman; why wouldn't I want to keep a reminder of her?”

“I don't understand.” Abby shook her head, and then it began to dawn on her. “It was you! You were the conservationist that was kind to her when her friends deserted her!” Cutter nodded. “Then that means you're... Oh my god!!! No wonder you freaked out on me the other night!”

Abby was blinking rapidly, not sure whether to cry, laugh or get angry. Cutter reached for her shaking hand but she shrugged him away.

“Believe me, Abby. If I'd known she was pregnant I would've...”

“No-one knew she was pregnant; I don't think she even realised herself until it was too late to do anything about it.” Her tears began to fall; this was a story she'd been told so many times. “I was an inconvenience. She'd have got rid of me if she'd had the chance. I was the child she didn't want; the child nobody wanted.”

“Don't talk like that, Abby!”

“Why not? It's the truth. My grandparents were ashamed that she'd got herself pregnant so young and out of wedlock; they couldn't bare to look at me most of the time. David Maitland rescued her; made an honest woman of her and was prepared to let people believe that I was his baby. They thought he was a hero. But she resented me for ruining her life, and in the end he hated the both of us. They wished I'd never been born.” The venom in her voice made Cutter feel sick. He should have been there; taken responsibility for once in his life. Abby's issues clearly stemmed from early childhood – she'd spent her entire life being told that she wasn't wanted and now she'd built a protective wall around herself so high she couldn't see that someone did want her.

“I have so many regrets. I should have made an effort to find her, and I'm sorry that you went through all of that because I wasn't man enough. You have to understand though; keeping in touch with someone back then wasn't as easy as it is now. When she didn't write back to me, I assumed she'd just dismissed me as a holiday romance.”

“You're just like every other man!” Abby snapped, standing up. “You got what you wanted and cast her aside. I promised myself that I would never allow myself to be used like she was.”

“Sit down, Abby.”

“Is that an order as my boss or my father?” 

“Neither. It's a request as a concerned friend. Can you at least let me be that?”

Abby's face softened and she nodded. She really could use a friend right now. She was exhausted, physically and mentally; she'd been fighting for her life for several hours, her best friend declared that he loved her and now a man she had warmed to without realising had suddenly announced that he was her real father. It was too much. “I just want to go home, get cleaned up and crawl under my duvet.”

Cutter sighed. Maybe he should have waited a few more days to tell her? “I understand. It's been a difficult and emotional time for all of us. Especially Connor.” He nodded over to the sad figure leaning against his car looking inside. Next to him was one of the ARC soldiers and they were talking about something. “Don't be so hard on him, eh? He's one of the good guys.”

Abby sat down again. “Did you hear what he said?”

“Yeah. Can't say it surprised me.”

“Do you think he meant it?”

“I do, yes. See, Connor reminds me very much of myself at times. He doesn't think he's good enough for someone like you, so he's settled for the first person that seems to want him. I guess that's what happened with me and Helen. Part of me didn't think Rainbow would actually want me for anything other than a holiday fling, so when Helen caught me at a time when I was feeling vulnerable...” He shook himself. “Listen to me rambling on! You should go before you catch your death of cold.” Connor was slowly making his way over to them.

Abby stood up and smiled. Connor was muttering something about not being able to find his car keys. “I reckon I must've lost 'em when I fell into that water tank. That soldier thought he might be able to hotwire the ignition but it would mean smashing the window,” he said sadly.

“Here, take my car.” Cutter threw his keys to Connor. “I'll get a lift with Stephen. You get Abby home and take care of her.” He winked.

“Go get the car started,” Abby said, briefly touching his elbow and smiling. “I'll be there in a minute.” They watched Connor walk away and waited until he was out of ear shot.

“What do I do?” Abby said quietly. “Everyone I've let into my life has let me down – used me, taken what they wanted and then dumped me. I can't go there again.”

“Connor's not like that – hasn't today proved anything to you? What he did was pretty amazing, and it was all because he loves you. Don't let him make the same mistakes with his life that I did. Don't let Caroline become his Helen.” Cutter sniffed and saw the look on Abby's face. He knew what she was going to say. “And that's advice from a father who just wants to see his daughter happy.”

Abby felt her cheeks burn. She still wasn't quite sure what to make of Cutter's revelation, but right now her mind was too full of what Connor had said and what that meant for her to even begin to make sense of that as well. The words 'daughter' and 'father' were not associated with positive things in her mind. 

Connor sounded the car horn impatiently. “I'd better go,” she said apologetically. 

“Yes. Let him look after you; get a good night's sleep and we can write up our report for Lester tomorrow.”

Abby blinked and for moment she held Cutter's gaze. Through the tiredness etched on his face, she could see a spark of hope. She'd always seen a kindness in his eyes, and had connected with him from the start – something she'd assumed was down to their shared appreciation of reptiles, albeit from slightly different Scientific disciplines. Now she realised that connection was something else, and one she'd never experienced before. She was more than willing to accept him as a good friend, but the father thing was going to need a little work.

The car horn beeped again and Abby turned hurriedly, rushing to the car and Connor. Cutter watched her climb into the front passenger seat and pull the seat belt around her. Had he said enough to make her let Connor in or was it going to take something drastic like shoving them through an anomaly together to make them wake up to their feelings for each other? As the car pulled away, he took a deep breath and strode off to find Stephen.

-o-

Abby closed her eyes and took a deep breath; counting to ten in her head. She was not going to lose it. It seemed she'd been right and Cutter was wrong – Connor was just like all the others. She'd called him on what he'd said on the other side of the anomaly, hoping that he'd say it again. If he could say the words to her face when he didn't think she was about to die, then perhaps she'd give him a chance to prove he meant them. But he was stuttering, clearly trying to think of some way to back track on what had happened.

When she opened them again, Connor's face had changed. It was almost as if he was digging deep inside to find some courage. She willed him to find it and held his gaze for a moment. Something passed between them, and for a moment Abby thought he was going to speak. Then the door opened and Caroline appeared at the top of their stairs.

“You're not even dressed, Connor!”

“Dressed?”

Abby bit her lip; fighting her frustration was getting harder. Did that woman have a key to the front door now? “Caroline.. look, please don't take offence, but Connor and I have had a really bad day and we just want to get cleaned up and have a quiet night.”

“Abby! It's OK, Caroline. I'll be ready in a minute. Just let me go and...”

Abby practically shoved him away and stood between him and Caroline, facing her square on. “I think Connor's just too polite to let you down, especially when you've obviously gone to so much trouble. What he really needs to do right now is have an early night.” Cutter's words echoed around her head. She at least owed it to Connor to save him from Caroline, even if he wouldn't admit to what he'd said.

“It's extremely difficult to get tickets for this play. Connor...” Caroline leaned to one side to try and see Connor, but Abby moved again to block her view and scowled. “Connor?”

“If it's that difficult, then I'm sure there will be plenty of people willing to go with you.” Abby stared defiantly at Caroline until finally she got the message and began to back away down the stairs. Abby noted that Connor had not attempted to argue. That had to be a good sign.

“I understand. I hope you both feel better tomorrow. I'll call you in the morning, Connor.” Caroline tried to sound cheery as she disappeared from sight, but Abby suspected she was far from happy at being given the brush off. 

The door clicked shut and Connor found his voice. “Why'd you do that, Abby? I can make my own decisions.”

“Fine, whatever.” Abby sighed. “I'm going to take a bath. If you really want to go to the theatre with her, then go after her. Otherwise, when I get out of the bath we'll talk about what you actually said. You're not getting off the hook lightly on this one.” She didn't wait for a response. She pushed her way into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.

It was the first moment she'd had to herself since all of the revelations, and her head began to spin. She turned on the taps and poured in some of her herbal scented bubble bath. The combination of the steam and the scent were soothing, and Abby sat on the edge of the bath just trying to calm her mind. Once she was inside the warm water and covered with bubbles, she'd be able to switch off just for a few minutes. Everything else could be dealt with later.

Suddenly there was the sound of something smashing, and Connor yelled. Abby was out of the door in a flash. Connor was sat crouched on the kitchen floor, surrounded by broken glass and water and nursing his hand which was bleeding. 

“Here, let me see,” Abby said softly, taking his injured hand. He tried to pull away initially, but Abby would not allow him to. 

“It's just a scratch. The jug slipped out m'hand didn't it, then when I tried to clear it up...”

“I don't think you'll need stitches, but I should clean it up and make sure there's no bits of glass left in it. Come on, there's some antiseptic in the bathroom.” She practically dragged him into the bathroom and put his hand under the sink tap allowing the warm water to cleanse the wound. She paused only to turn off the bath taps and stared wistfully at the bubbles. Her moment to herself would wait; Connor was more important right now.

Connor winced as Abby applied some cream to it. Under other circumstances, she'd tell him to stop being a wuss, but today he'd proved he was far from being a wuss. He didn't deserve ridicule, not even in jest. “It looks clean to me. I'll stick some padding and a plaster over it to stop it getting infected whilst it heals.” As she reached up into the cupboard to look for what she needed, Connor gripped her free hand. 

“Thank you. I was supposed to be looking after you tonight, and here you are patching me up. Sorry.”

“You can still look after me. Whilst I have my bath, you can sort something out for our dinner and then we can curl up on the sofa with a beer each.” She realised Connor was still holding her hand, and she'd made no attempt to pull away or release it. Something hung in the air between them; a tension so thick Abby could almost touch it. 

Finally, Connor broke the connection and muttered that he should leave Abby to her bath. The door clicked shut, and she sat on the edge of the bath to finally begin ridding herself of the damp and somewhat smelly clothes she was wearing. Suddenly, the door opened again and Connor was stood there, mouth opening and closing like a goldfish. Abby had seen that look on his face before; he was trying to say something important but couldn't get the words out because of his nerves.

“Connor?”

He took a deep breath. “Abby. I was wonderin' … you know... um...” He glanced down at his feet nervously, struggling to make eye contact with her. After a moment, he looked up and held her gaze. “I was wondering what sort of pizza I should order for you?”

“I'll let you choose,” Abby said softly. “As long as it's not pineapple.”

“I know... you don't like cooked fruit.” He nodded and began to back out of the bathroom,

“A cold beer would be nice too. Give me a shout if the pizza arrives before I get out of the bath.”

The door closed again, and Abby began to peel off her layers of clothing. She'd decided to just throw them away; even if she could wash out the smell they'd always remind her of this awful experience. Connor burst through the door again; this time with a look of determination on his face.

“If I don't say this now, I probably never will,” he said. “That thing I said.... I believe I said that I love you. There... said it.” He took a deep breath and looked as if a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. It was all Abby needed to hear. She moved over to him and cupped his face in both hands, pulling him closer. Her lips pressed softly against his and lingered as a tingle of excitement spread through her body. 

“We can talk about this properly later when I'm not so smelly,” she laughed. “Now, let me have my bath in peace eh? The water'll be getting cold!”

“Sorry... um... I'd better go and order the pizzas.” He turned and was out of the door. This time, Abby pulled the bolt across, determined to get her moment to herself.

-o-

The final slice of pizza sat in the box on the table in front of them and half drank bottles of beer were placed next to it. Abby rested her head on Connor's shoulder and snuggled herself into him, allowing his arm to curl around her. It felt nice, comforting... it felt right. Whilst she'd been in the bath, Connor had changed into his old sweat pants and the large baggy t-shirt he sometimes slept in when it was cold. She'd simply pulled her fluffy dressing gown on and joined him on the sofa. 

Abby knew Connor loved her; perhaps she'd always known it deep down, but now she had confirmation. Cutter had been right after all; Connor wasn't like the others, and now she was looking forward to slowly letting him into her heart. Perhaps she'd even be able to confide everything about her past to him in time.

“Conn?” Something had moved to the front of her mind. She needed to start making sense of the other revelation from today. “What sort of father do you think Cutter would've been if he'd had kids?”

Connor looked slightly amused. “Where did that come from?”

“Humour me, Connor. I'm just thinking a few things over. I'm allowed to aren't I? I almost died today!”

“OK. I think Cutter would have been one of those cool dads that lets his kids stay up late watching stuff they shouldn't on TV and lets them eat ice cream out of the tub.”

“You think so?”

“Mm... and his kids would've been really smart and the envy of all the other kids in school.” Connor waited for Abby to respond but there was silence. He looked down; her eyes were closed and she was breathing softly and rhythmically. Realising she'd fallen asleep, he stroked her cheek and pulled her closer, kissing the top of her head.

-0-0-0-0-

“Well, at least some good came out of yesterday,” Jenny commented. She and Cutter were stood looking down into the main hub of the ARC, watching Abby and Connor.

“Yeah. About time eh?” Cutter smiled to himself. Abby had obviously taken his advice. Connor was sat at the ADD, and Abby was stood beside him with her hand resting on his shoulder stroking it. He seemed to be explaining something to her, but Abby wasn't listening – she was gazing at him with a look of devotion and pride. 

He followed Jenny down the stairs and made his way over to the ADD. Abby blushed and moved her hand away, but when she saw Jenny's smile, she put it back.

“Can we have a chat in my office, Abby. I just need to go over a few details for my report. I know some of it is painful, but it's necessary.” Cutter said.

Abby nodded and followed him, leaving Jenny with Connor. He was typing away furiously with a look of total concentration on his face. “What are you working on?” Jenny asked.

“Just done a bit of a system upgrade, cleared out a few old files and stuff. Just need to change the password.”

Jenny watched him and laughed. “Abby Temple?... seriously Connor. You've only just got together, isn't that a little premature?”

“I have a good feeling, that's all.” Connor smiled.

“Just don't tell her. She might run a mile if she thinks you're already planning to marry her!” She shook her head and smiled. She had a good feeling about them too.

-o-

It seemed almost a lifetime ago that Abby had last been in this office, chatting to Cutter about her mother and worrying that he wasn't looking after himself properly. Now that she thought about it, it was a daughterly thing to do – fussing around him, making him a sandwich and nagging him to get some sleep. Perhaps their hearts had known the connection between them long before their heads had.

“Are you OK? I didn't expect to see you today. Wouldn't have blamed you if you'd stayed tucked up in bed.” Cutter smiled, but there was a concern on his face.

“I ache a bit, but I'm fine.”

“Good. And I see things with you and Connor have improved.”

Abby felt her cheeks redden yet again. “I took your advice. Let's just say that Caroline is no longer an issue and … it was kind of nice to fall asleep in Connor's arms.”

“Well it will certainly make things easier around here if you two aren't arguing all the time.” 

There was an awkward silence. Cutter knew he should have waited until Abby had mentally recovered from her ordeal before dropping his bombshell on her. He'd probably ruined any chance of trying to be a part of her life already. “I don't really need your input on this report, I just wanted to make sure you were OK. I'm glad you and Connor sorted things out too.”

Abby turned to leave, but then stopped. She couldn't just leave things up in the air; that had been half of the problem with Connor, she couldn't let it happen with Cutter too. “That other thing... I haven't really got my head around it, and to be honest... David Maitland was the man I called my father, despite all of his faults. I have a lot of negative associations with the word and you don't fit into any of those. I don't want you to fit into any of them either. You're a decent man... caring, kind, wise.... But I'd like it if you'd be a good friend, one I can come to for some advice. I have a feeling that I'm going to need a lot of it since it seems I'm getting myself into a relationship with Connor.”

“Oh, so you're 'in a relationship' with him now eh?” Cutter mocked.

“I won't be updating my Facebook status just yet,” Abby smiled. “So how about it? Can we be good friends?”

“I'd like that. I'd like that a lot.” The relief was almost overwhelming. She wasn't pushing him away and she was still letting him into her life. “Now, before you go back to being all misty-eyed over Connor, can I get a hug?”

Abby moved over to Cutter and they wrapped their arms around each other. They held each other for a few long moments; an understanding passing between them before they parted. Abby made her way to the door to leave, but as she put her hand on the handle, Cutter called her back.

“I'll be your friend, and offer you some fatherly advice from time to time whether you want it or not... but promise me one thing? When Connor finally gets you down the aisle to marry you, you'll let me walk beside you as a father should and give you away?”

“I'd like that,” Abby smiled. “I'd like that a lot.”


End file.
